Sometimes you just need a friend.

So I had a craptastic few months.  With solar flairs, a lunar eclipse, meteor showers, a solar eclipse, and Mercury in retrograde, small problems turned into catastrophes (as my readers discovered in my last post).  It wasn’t much of a surprise I didn’t feel like writing.

With everything bad happening in my life, it wasn’t the time to think of life changing decisions.  Sometimes, a person can’t help themselves.  We’re living life all the time that thinking about the next step is unavoidable.

girl-idea-iconI’m a successful person.  My mind understands that, yet sometimes my heart doesn’t follow.  Where do doubts live?  The heart or the mind?  I think the mind is the seat of logic and the heart is the seat of emotions as do most Asian philosophers.

Thinking that I wasn’t good enough for a certain PhD program, I was going to let my dream go and be practical.  Trouble is I’m not a practical person.  Whenever I try and pick the practical path, it never feels right.  Unpractical things seem to be exceedingly easy for me.  While that seems logical now, it didn’t seem logical a week ago.

What happens when I’m feeling these pangs of self-doubt?  An old classmate from graduate school steps in.  She has amazing timing since we haven’t spoken for a year or two.  When we graduated from the Masters program, she continued onto a PhD program (one she’s a year away from completing) and I went on a break…one that lasted three years longer than intended.

Just speaking with her reminded me that this was my path and one I wanted to walk.  PhD program?  Definitely.  Practicality?  Keep it since it’s not for me.

girl-motivated-iconIf I can get these allergy migraines to stop, I can edit my writing sample and write my “why I want to be in the PhD program” essay.  Pain is not conducive to inspirational writing.  That’s why most great writers turn into alcoholics and drug users.


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